Naked Birthday Party….

If there is one thing I hate about parenting, it has to be invited to the naked birthday parties, stay with me here…


Meme 6

I am noticing a trend. Whenever I start a story about me and some Hot Mom’s it usually included the word sushi. So, keeping with that theme….

A few months ago I was out for sushi with a couple of Mommy’s that I met in a Mommy and Me Class.

We started chatting about ideas for our three year olds birthday party. Sledding, Skating, Movies, Bowling, blah, blah, blah.  Riveting.

Then Mommy #1 had something to share.

She recently took her daughter to a swimming birthday party.

“Oh that’s a good idea!”  I say.

“Sort of.” She replied.  Mommy #1 went on to talk about how the swimming is great, but then you call go to the change room, look at each other get naked and then go and eat cake.

I had never thought of that.

Such a good point.

I am still traumatized from my grade 6 school field trip to the city. We took the bus for 3 hours and then stayed at the YMCA in Regina, Saskatchewan.  I never went swimming, but somehow ended up in a change room where two women were having a shower.


I had hardly even seen myself naked. And here were these 2 grown women in the shower.


I had never seen so much bush in my life.

Another time, I went to an aquafit class with a co worker.  I’ll save the story, but I can still see her bent over drying her feet.  See what goes on in my head? It’s not pretty.

So, when Whirlwind was invited to a Swimming Birthday Party last weekend. I started to sweat.


Firstly, showing off my 200lb body in swimsuit is not my most favourite thing to do. My breasts are just out of control. But, secondly, getting naked in front of all of my friends and then wrestling my bra and panties (yes, I used the word panties, I like it)  over my wet body and flopping my boobs into my bra is NOT a good look for me.

Thankfully, there was a private change room. And me and my boobs were able to wrestle in private.

Did you know that I hit Jillian Michaels and was on Tyra Banks Tv Show the Fab Life?

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16 thoughts on “Naked Birthday Party….

  1. I would never get naked in front of my friends… too much bush is happening in these panties. Eek.

    Guess that’s what happens when you never get laid? =P

  2. #1. What is people’s problem with the word panties? I love it too and I call all underwear in this house panties. Even if it belongs to a boy.

    #2. I would never ever ever ever go to a swimming party for my kid. If my kid got an invite like that I would tell them they couldn’t go because we had big plans to do something else. And then I would pay whatever I had to to make those big plans happen.

    Whatever it took.



    I love when Jim are my only male follower besides Zed and it brings me so much “joy” to read your perspective.

    I also like the word “you”. Might get that screened on my panties.

  4. I use the word panties, but I don’t use the word bush…hmn. something to think about. Perhaps I have lived in the city too long, its very bare here in Toronto.

    But, I do sometimes call it my cupcake. I hope one day someone will bring ina bowl of icing.


    Anyhoo…Even though I don’t have sex either, things are still looking good there…i’m deathly afraid that my 3 year old is going to pull my pajamas down again in our bay window again. Um, terrible since I don’t like to wear panties with them.


  5. You’re hilarious! And can I say, the fact that you have boobs to wrestle with leaves me green with envy. My sort of just sink into my body leaving bystanders to wonder as to my gender…ok, not really. I got bush. I hear ya though on the whole bush thing. I have the public changeroom at the yoga studio where I go because the elderly ladies are famous for bending over to pick get stuff out of their lockers while buck naked. I’m sorry, but 85 year old bush is sort of like looking at roadkill.

  6. @Melanie: You don’t have sex but you still take care of things?Wow. Can I have your atutograph?

    Sandra: I have to lift my boobs to dry under them. Still jelous?

    BWOMM: Keep it together, girl! 🙂

  7. We once went to a swim party when Miss A was 6 and TB was 3. TB went to the bathroom and came outside where EVERYONE was buck-assed naked, holding his swimsuit in one chubby little hand, because he had to be NUDE to pee and couldn’t get his wet suit back on. It’s a good thing he was so damned cute. It still made me wish the ground would open up and swallow me.

  8. oh I hated changing after swimming. I tucked the towel under my chin and never exposed anything. but there were some older larger ladies that would talk to each other naked and one actually did a small squat and tucked a hand towel between her snush and kept talking.

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