I’m a PTA Mom…

Yes, I read the jokes about PTA Mom’s being those crazy psycho Mom’s that you steer away from at school pick up and drop off. I see the meme’s of Mom’s lying to the other PTA aka PAC Mom’s so they don’t have to go to the meetings. I’ve seen the movies of the other PTA Mom’s shaming each other over what they bring to the bake sale.


I get it.

Still, I am proud to be a mother fucking PTA Mom.

Truly deep down inside, I don’t understand why every parent isn’t a PTA Mom or Dad. Sure, maybe you aren’t a joiner. I know lots of my friends who don’t join because their career is super demanding. Or you have social anxiety. Or you hate the other PTA Mom’s, which I get because I am totally hateable.

Am I that Mom that asks you if you can come help at the bake sale and smiles at you like you are my best friend? Guilty as charged.

I like being a PTA Mom.

I like raising money for my kid’s school.

I like volunteering to drive for field trips.

I like reading with the kids in the classroom.

I like helping with hot lunch.

Now there are about a million other things that I do not excel at in life.

My house is a mess.

My kids are eating frozen pizza’s for supper tonight. Again.

My hair hasn’t been washed in 6 days.

But, I can sell raffle tickets like a mother fucker for my kid’s school.

I guess you could say, I know my strengths.

Except I don’t know my strengths. The last 3 years I have been the PTA Secretary. I am horrible at it. I don’t want to do it, but someone has to step the fuck up and do it even though I don’t understand how to use a god damned hole punch.

Listen, I am not trying to shame you to join your PTA. I am sure some of them suck ass. I mean sometimes the PTA  meetings that I go too are redundant, but for the most part, we all end up laughing and making fun of each other. Or really, I make fun of other people, but you get the point. Shit, maybe that’s why only a handful of us come on a regular basis. Meh.

Has my life changed from being a PTA Mom? Sure. I feel more connected. I like the other parents that come to the meetings.  There’s a group of Mom’s that I get together with on a semi-regular basis. We all met on my first few years of joining PTA. We get together for lunch and catch up on life, our kids have either aged out or changed schools or they are busy with work that they just can’t attend the meetings anymore. I hope that as our kid’s get older we continue to get together for lunch to eat expensive quinoa and lightly massaged kale.

Also, in full disclosure, I would like to say sorry to the new Mom I bombarded at school drop off this morning to see if she was on the Facebook Page, ‘Because it is a really good page to join so you know what is going on at the school and so you don’t miss anything, for example, the kid’s are having McDonald’s tomorrow as a special Fun Lunch. Just look for it on Facebook!” Except I am not sorry.

I’m going to join the fuck out of you.