200 lbs of Female Friend…

My Book Group recently went to Vegas and it was beyond amazing. There were 7 of us and it worked like a bloody dream.

I hate that I even have to mention that it worked like a bloody dream.  People just assume that because its a group of women going on a trip, that its just not going to work.  That annoys the hell out of me.

Whoa.

What is that?

It’s a  soap box.

Excuse me for a moment, I think I have to stand on it.

You know what really bugs me?

Women who act like not having any female friends is by their own choice.  Oh, I fucking doubt that.

There is nothing better than female friends. Personally, and go ahead and take this personally, there is something the fuck wrong with you, if you can’t make, keep or maintain female friendships.

Firstly, its the fact that they even tell you that. Um, I’m a woman sitting in front of you while you tell me how women are such two faced bitches and you can only relate to men and only have male friends.

Wham am I chopped liver?

You stupid cow.

In case you forgot, I have a vagina.

Secondly, you must be the shittiest friend on the planet. I really feel sorry for you. You are really, really, really missing out.  You need to go to friend school.

Off my soap box.

Wow.

Any who….

I love Vegas. It is probably my most favourite place on earth.  For some reason, I am very confident in Vegas. I feel like a super model.  I have no problem strutting around my 200 lb body in a tankini as if I were wearing a string bikini in a 120 lb body.

But, I was also pretty drunk.

And I love my Book Group.  I feel pretty lucky to be part of this group of women for the last 7 years.  We all couldn’t be more different from each other, but somehow we got something special going on.  I wish that for anyone.

What I don’t wish for anyone, is a job handing out “call girl cards” on the Vegas Strip. Who knew you could sick of hearing, “hooka, hooka, booby, booby, pussy, pussy”, all day long?