I don't want anything fancy. Please no jewellery and definitely no flowers.
All I want is two hours.
Two hours by myself in the bathroom.
Two hours with no one pulling at the shower curtain.
Two hours with no one knocking on the door.
Two hours to shave any part of my body that I feel like shaving.
Two hours to deep condition.
Two hours to use a loofah.
Two hours to use bubble bath.
Two hours to exfoliate.
Two hours without hearing the words, "Mommy" or "Are you done yet?"
Two hours with no one "going boom boom" while I have a bath.
Two hours to make my own "boom boom".
My own boom boom?
Wow.
On Sunday, I am going to have a "boom boom" with no one bothering me. It will be the "boom boom" of all "boom booms". It will be The Mother Of All Boom Booms!
Happy Mothers Day!
Hope you get your wish and then some!
ReplyDeleteTo dream the impossible dream...I hope your Mother's Day wish is granted. I have started drinking my coffee in the showe rsince that seems to be the only way to drink a hot cup. So, my Mother's Day wish is a hot shower and hot cup of coffee...separately.
ReplyDeleteYou my friend are a bloody genius.
DeleteMy fiance calls it going boom boom when he makes a number two.
ReplyDeleteI learned it from a co worker. Since the first time I heard it, I have never turned back.
DeleteI totally understand! I rarely get to go into the washroom alone either to shower or boom boom or anything! So I hope you get your wish!
DeleteI thought boom boom meant something else. I was going to ask if you have your copy of 50 Shades Of Grey.
ReplyDeleteI hear that's good for the boom boom. Other kind of boom boom.
I have not read it yet. Have you? Details please!
DeleteSee and here I thought you already did when you were on air and Stairway to Heaven came on....didn't you once say that songs that exceed 7 minutes of airtime are for bathroom purposes only? Bahahaha!
ReplyDeleteThat is also true.
DeleteIt's funny, until you mentioned it, I didn't realize how much time I spent in the bathroom- it's kind of like a little refuge. My partner always asks me: "What are you doing up there?!?" The I reply with: "What aren't I doing?!?" Could be shaving, popping some pimples, trying new hairstyles, playing with makeup- the possibilities are endless. And although I don't have kids yet, my dog is my constant bathroom companion- if I shut the door tight, then he'll sit outside and cry. If the door is just a little ajar, he pushes it open and sticks his head in a la Jack Nickelson in "The Shining"....a little unnerving when you're mid boom-boom. ;) R.
ReplyDeleteGUFFAH @ your last line!
DeleteWe just moved into a new house and the doorknobs are super hard to turn. What would be an inconvenience to some was a blessing in disguise to me. The kids cannot get into the bathroom when the door is closed. They stand there and bitch and moan and I blissfully yell back "it's open, just turn the knob". Guilt free!
ReplyDeleteBtw - had never heard the boom boom term before. That will absolutely become the new standard in our house.
Keep up the great posts! Love them all :)